Wednesday, July 7, 2010

Mr. Big and Carrie - Sex in the City

I'm on twitter, another social networking website. I'm not only shocked to be apart of the scratch your butt update craze but secretly relish the new updates from my connects. I follow alot of different blogs and heart them all. The cool thing is many of my favorite bloggers are on twitter and shout out their favorite bloggers random post via tweets. So, I'm all kinds of connected and my blog monster is constantly fed. I've noticed a disappointing trend while devouring my informative meals. Many of the female bloggers have knighted their asshole boyfriends who they can't shake " Mr. Big".

Mr. Big is the asshole boyfriend archetype. The guy whose expanded your limited horizons at any period of time, with who ones experienced unrequited love (comfortable ego boosting beneficial lust on Big's part),enjoyed good or amazing sex with, shared special moments, good conversations, innately bad for his "Carrie" ( snake charming abilities), heart breaker, etc. The traits just mentioned along with many others makes big a toxic and energy draining partner. Carrie for example was swept away by Big's looks , debonair style, swagger, other superficial things but could never feel comfortable in their relationship. She couldn't trust him enough to be her imperfect self, give him her unguarded heart, reciprocate love, appreciate her, and be the woman he couldn't live without. I always hated that Sex in the city romanticized a relationship between Carrie and Big. Carrie cheated on a man who wanted to share his life, name, and world with her(Adian) for a man who took a job in another country without thinking of her, wouldn't give her a key or allow her to leave a toothbrush at his place, married a random chick shortly after their break us, professed love after her new partner asked her to move out of the country, and finally left her at the altar on their wedding day. He broke my heart and i was just a viewer. I'm sorry ladies that's not love. We don't love that way , therefore deserve a whole lot better.So for all the women calling that man in their life " Mr. Big". Let it go ........

I attended a together apart event which I encourage everyone to experience. It's a discussion about relationships involving both men and women. One woman in the audience said something very profound after one of the panelist admitted to being guarded in her relationships. She said " We as woman need to have faith that we'll find someone that's right for us, we can't say that we have faith and continually find ourselves in bad relationships, returning to them, and addressing fears by settling ". I have to tell you her comment forced me to look inward and admit that my faith hadn't been strong. My lack of faith was the reason my comfortable first love , who hurt me many times in many different ways, was my " Mr.Big ". I've decided to trust my intuition and not even entertain potential partners if I'm not feeling it 110%. I was forced to learn this lesson again recently by the way of a betrayal by a man considered a friend. If it isn't or doesn't feel right, let it go and have no doubts.

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